When the Bill Comes Due

I have been working on a project, a retrospective of the Lolligaggers, the band I was once in.  And I have found that revisiting the past through memories and discussions with old friends has dredged up some old stuff, stuff that I am not really interested in having dredged up, and it is sometimes uncomfortable for me.  I have an idea for this thing that could be great, a book, maybe, and a podcast, and an exploration of the creative drive, letting the band serve as a stand in for every band, every creative venture that doesn’t serve as a...

Because. That’s Why.

Something that I have always loved about punk is the DIY culture of it; that we don’t want or need your help.  It’s tough and it’s more work, but we are free. I realized that a lot of my work stems from anger, and a lot of anything I have done, come to that.  My songs were driven by anger, at myself, at injustice.  Stupid, self indulgent idealism. I remember fighting with my first girlfriend, and I was so mad that things were hard, that nothing worked like it did in stories, that relationships were work.  It pissed me off; I...

In Which I Allow Myself a Moment of Whining and Self-Pity Before Getting Back to Work

I have been in a loop, a snake eating its own tail.  I’ve got work to do, words to write, people to help. I’ve got pending requests and approaching deadlines, and all I can do is sit here and watch internet videos of people falling down, or getting bit by geese. This is not block, which I am convinced is not real, but is a word used by someone who doesn’t understand their own story.  I’ve got stories that I understand.  They are there, all queued up, I’ve got ten days to complete a tricky bit of storytelling, a strange...

A Dusty Old Cassette

This is all a lie, or at best, a partial truth.  All of this is a caricature, a persona, a mask.  You don’t get to see me; you don’t get to know me.  You get what I share and this is it. So I have something to say and I’m not sure how to say it, or if I mean what it is that I have to say; I’m just going to pound the keys and hope for the best. I saw something written about the current political situation that said, in effect, on the bright side, think of all...

Full Reverse

I love watching fail videos.  Some fat guy slips on the ice and smashes his ice cream cone in his own face, trampoline accidents, someone getting whacked in the face at a pinata party, all comedy gold.  I eat it up; I can’t help myself.  I like this stuff partly because I feel a certain superiority to these people: What were you thinking, dumbass?  But mostly I like it because I can recognize my own failures in them.  I, too, have slipped on ice, wrecked my skateboard, fallen off a roof.  I, too, have dropped my ice cream, have tripped on...